Describing the simplicity of running a marathon: “Step one, you start running. There is no step two.”
Look: our forefathers died for the pursuit of happiness! Not the “sit-around-and-wait” of happiness! Now if you want, you can go to the same bar, drink the same beer, talk to the same people every day, *or*, you can *lick* the Liberty Bell! You can grab life by the crack and lick the crap out of it!
Every Halloween, I bring a spare costume, in case I strike out with the hottest girl at the party.

That way, I have a second chance to make a first impression.
When I get sad, I stop being sad, and be awesome instead. True story!
Seriously, whaat do you do for a living? Barney : He he, PLEASE…